|Photo by ssalonso (Flickr)|
It hurt not only because I ached deeply for my children when they weren’t with me, but also because of the reality of my situation. My obsession to lose weight (anorexia nervosa) became so important that it cost me my family.
My disappointment in me was tortuously painful and affected me greatly.
One Sunday, I drove to the designated place to hand over my small children. Surprisingly, my sister-in-law met me there, rather than the children’s father.
Seeing my sister-in-law caught me by surprise and I became so self-conscious that I couldn’t speak or look at her. As I helped the kids get into her car, I knew how I must have looked: snobbish and ungrateful for her time.
In that moment, my sister-in-law could have easily judged me. How could she not? If I were in her shoes, I would have thought the woman who didn’t have the decency to even look at me, much less thank me, was at least rude. Wouldn’t you? But, if that is what she was thinking, then she would have been wrong.
In reality, I was just too ashamed to face her.
And that’s the point. Most of the time, we don’t have all of the facts to make a fair judgment about someone in a particular situation. John 7:24 commands us to “Stop judging by mere appearances, and make a right judgment” (NIV 1984).
My sister-in-law probably never judged me as I imagined. (Knowing her, she most likely didn’t.) However, many times, I’ve formed an opinion about someone – and thought I was correct in my assessment – but I was wrong. Sometimes completely wrong.
So wouldn’t it be wise (and compassionate) to consider the possibility that perhaps we’re judging a situation by mere appearances?
Isn’t that what we would want others to do for us?
Please consider meditating on and/or memorizing John 7:24. And let me know how I can pray for you.
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