Sunday, April 27, 2014

A Saved Marriage - Mine!

In honor of Bert's and mine upcoming 8th(!) Wedding Anniversary, I am re-posting stories (one this week and another one two weeks from now) about some of the struggles - and miracles - Bert and I experienced in our marriage. I think you will easily see why I consider these two posts my favorites!

After reading our stories, please feel free to leave a comment sharing your stories; including how Bert and I (and our readers) can encourage you.

A Saved Marriage - Mine!

Bert sat in his chair in our living room without turning on the television. Whenever he does that, I know something is on his mind. But I wasn’t expecting, “I’m not happy in this marriage.”

The words punched me in my stomach. I was so stunned that I couldn’t answer; but my thoughts screamed, Neither am I!
For years, Bert and I have been having difficulties in our marriage. However, later that evening, I picked up the book, Love & Respect, with the intent of finishing it this time. As I began to practice the principles presented in Dr. Emerson Eggerichs’ book, not only did God use it to change my behavior, but our marriage changed as well.

Now Bert and I are both becoming the spouses we always wanted to be. He asked me to forgive him for the years of rejection, and I asked him to forgive my years of disrespectful behavior.

A few months later, Bert registered us to attend the Love & Respect Marriage Conference which was held this past weekend. It was fabulous!

I asked Bert what he liked most about the conference. He said “I liked the way Emerson challenged me to keep my focus on what God is calling me to do as a husband – to love you unconditionally. When Emerson acted out God (in heaven) pulling for us to succeed, it helped me to see how God is always there to help me not to react to you in an unloving way.”

My favorite moment at the conference was when Bert took my hand and led me down the aisle. We joined the other married couples to commit ourselves, before God, to love and respect our spouses unconditionally.

Did you catch it? Bert took my hand and led me – rather than me elbowing him to “please let’s do this!”

As we continue to apply what we learned from the Love & Respect book and conference, Bert and I candidly admit we have not arrived. We are a “work in progress” for sure! However, we are pleased to report: forgiving, loving and respecting each other is much easier today than when our journey first began.

My prayer:
Father, help me to lean on You and Your Word so I can continue to respect my husband, Bert, unconditionally!

Bert's prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father, please help me to remember to always love Sheryl, no matter the circumstances. Guide me to have the wisdom to appreciate her and to understand her even when we disagree. Let me always love Sheryl as myself.

This week’s goal:
This week, Bert and I commit to continue showing each other unconditional love and respect with our words, actions and thoughts. And to ask God how He would like us to reach out to other couples with the love and respect message.

What about you?
  • Do you need help in the way you speak or behave toward your husband or wife?

Ephesians 5:33 (NIV)
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Note: Memorizing Scripture Blog (for anyone) and the Coffee with Sheryl blog (for ladies) both have the Current Goals tab located under the blogs' headers. "Current Goals" offers several practical links including topics such as: being a better spouse or parent, choosing better eating and exercising habits, overcoming addictions, dealing with depression, etc. The Immediate Goals link (for setting task-related goals) is only available at the Coffee with Sheryl Blog

You may use pseudonyms (fake names).


  1. Our marriage is better each day as we grow in the love of the Lord and in the love we have
    for each other. I love you Sheryl, Keep up the good work. See you at home, Bert

    1. Thanks, Hon! I love you, too!!
      I'll have dinner ready when you get home. ;)

  2. Yours is such an inspiring story. Never have I seen such a tremendous turn around. Both you and Bert are wonderful people and I love you both. I am so glad and blessed by both of you. May you have many wonderful years ahead of you. Happy Anniversary!

    1. Thank you, Susan! The miracle God has done in our marriage - and in Bert and me - has been inspiring, indeed.

      Thank you for coming to my home (during that time) to pray with me for our marriage to be saved. God answered our prayers.

  3. Congratulations to both of you and especially to God our Father and His Son Jesus the Christ. I am very happy for you both. You are a great example to so many who might be struggling. Your sister in Christ, Barbara Hudson


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