Wednesday, October 2, 2013

A Saved Marriage - Mine!

Bert sat in his chair in our living room without turning on the television. Whenever he does that, I know something is on his mind. But I wasn’t expecting, “I’m not happy in this marriage.”

The words punched me in my stomach. I was so stunned that I couldn’t answer; but my thoughts screamed, Neither am I!
For years, Bert and I have been having difficulties in our marriage. However, later that evening, I picked up the book, Love & Respect, with the intent of finishing it this time. As I began to practice the principles presented in Dr. Emerson Eggerichs’ book, not only did God use it to change my behavior, but our marriage changed as well.

Now Bert and I are both becoming the spouses we always wanted to be. He asked me to forgive him for the years of rejection, and I asked him to forgive my years of disrespectful behavior.

A few months later, Bert registered us to attend the Love & Respect Marriage Conference which was held this past weekend. It was fabulous!

I asked Bert what he liked most about the conference. He said “I liked the way Emerson challenged me to keep my focus on what God is calling me to do as a husband – to love you unconditionally. When Emerson acted out God (in heaven) pulling for us to succeed, it helped me to see how God is always there to help me not to react to you in an unloving way.”

My favorite moment at the conference was when Bert took my hand and led me down the aisle. We joined the other married couples to commit ourselves, before God, to love and respect our spouses unconditionally.

Did you catch it? Bert took my hand and led me – rather than me elbowing him to “please let’s do this!”

As we continue to apply what we learned from the Love & Respect book and conference, Bert and I candidly admit we have not arrived. We are a “work in progress” for sure! However, we are pleased to report: forgiving, loving and respecting each other is much easier today than when our journey first began.

My prayer:
Father, help me to lean on You and Your Word so I can continue to respect my husband, Bert, unconditionally!

Bert's prayer:
Dear Heavenly Father, please help me to remember to always love Sheryl, no matter the circumstances. Guide me to have the wisdom to appreciate her and to understand her even when we disagree. Let me always love Sheryl as myself.

This week’s goal:
This week, Bert and I commit to continue showing each other unconditional love and respect with our words, actions and thoughts. And to ask God how He would like us to reach out to other couples with the love and respect message.

What about you?
  • Do you need help in the way you speak or behave toward your husband or wife?

Ephesians 5:33 (NIV)
However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

Note: This blog is for anyone who desires accountabiliity regarding their walk with Jesus. I have another blog for women only: (Once on the blog, click on the Current Goals tab to see several practical links regarding specific behavior issues, including being a better wife/mom.)


  1. This is really good Sheryl! And I love the picture; y'all are a lovely couple!

  2. Thank you, Barbara. I thank God for all He has done - and is still doing.
    And I think we make a lovely couple, too. One thing for sure, we're a lot "lovelier" than we were before!!

  3. Wow! That made me cry! I miss you! Love you!

    1. I miss you too, Susan! Let's get together soon.
      And thank you for visiting the blog and your comment. God is doing great and wonderful things.

  4. Sheryl, this made me cry, too. God bless you both abundantly! He is a restorer of relationships, that is for. sure.

    1. God is amazingly faithful! Thank you, Sheila, for stopping by and for your comment. It's nice to hear from you again.

  5. Replies
    1. Thank you, Jill! I am very blessed in all God is doing.
      I'm glad you read the post and appreciate your comment.
      Keep in touch!


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